If you’ve got somebody you love, somebody you really care about, somebody with whom you’d never want to part, make sure you let them know that this Valentines Day.

Get them something nice.

Write them a nice note.

Feed them their favorite food.

Or just go down to the basement and loosen their ball gag a little bit.

And don’t spray them with the fire hose.

It’s just one day. You can do it, slugger.